My friend Anusha* is a British Indian, from a practicing Hindu background, and she tells me that virtually every Indian friend from her background turns to this cultural tradition when they are ready to meet their future spouse.Intrigued, I asked Anusha and her husband Vikram what it’s like to date within a culture that accepts family matchmaking as the norm.I’d say roughly 75 percent of people my age from my background are dating to find their partner this way.”“My mum is always in contact with loads of people who are asking if she knows any girls or guys, and she’s been keeping a list with lots of names and details of different people; half of the time it’s not even for her own children, she’s just being the messenger for someone else,” Anusha says. Anusha wanted the guys her mom chose for her to be a few years older than her “but not too old,” to live in the same city, to be “the same height or taller, not shorter [than me]”, and to not be living with their parents. and he had to be able to provide for me, which means having a good education or a good job.” Essentially, her mum believed he needed to have his professional life in order before he was ready to start a family.(Luckily for her, her mother didn’t listen to that last rule because her future husband was actually living with his parents when he met her—unlike the loser she had imagined, he was cutting back on rent so he could save for a house.)Anusha’s mom was also following some strict traditional criteria that Anusha herself didn’t care about much either way: “From her perspective, he had to be from the same background, come from a good family . Anusha dated this way for about three years, and Vikram for about two.We received quite a few emails from women interested in us because of our profile.If you’re looking for a little fun, check out the live chat feature on Affairs Club.
“But it’s not just traditional families who do things this way; it’s very common in British-Indian culture.
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When my friend reached that point, her mom started giving her the details of different guys, and their family member or friend would give them her details, and then the suitor would get in touch with her.